Friday, September 23, 2011

Turkey Dinner - Part 1 of 1

© 2011 by Henry Melton

I wrote this one before the Wild Boars became such a big problem in this part of Texas.  But it makes me wonder....


"Evolution is like a turkey dinner," said Bud with satisfaction, nudging his buddy with the butt of his rifle.
"Huh?" asked Jeb.
"I guess.  How long has Mark been?  I'm not going to haul this thing all the way back to the break in the fence without the pickup."
"Okay," Jeb sighed, "tell me this great insight of yours."  He leaned back against the still warm 600 pound feathered bulk of their night's work.
Bud patted his prize, "You've got to admit we have evolution-in-action working here.  This jumbo turkey and his brothers never existed before.  And it's because all the ingredients came together, just like a turkey dinner.
"Forget all that millions-of-years noise you got in school.  Look at the charts in the encyclopedia sometime.  The dinosaurs died off, and overnight, there were a million mammals.  It was the vacuum that did it.  The land has room for only so many big herbivores, only so many big carnivores.  Kill off those and new ones have to pop up.
"Now look at what we did.  Humans are the top of the food chain!  We spent thousands of years killing off the big shag-nasties.  There used to be woolly mammoths, saber-toothed tigers, giant cave-bears roaming these hills.  Once we made them into barbecue, and hat-racks and nice winter coats for the Missus, the place was empty.  The vacuum started calling out for big critters.
Jeb shook his head.  "Okay.  If you say so.  I just wish Mark was back.  We are breaking some kind of law being here."
"I just hope you are right."
Bud looked up at the sound of a tree branch breaking in the distance, "I know I'm right... Did you hear that?  Mark must be coming down the ravine."
The two of them got to their feet and looked expectantly in the direction of the ravine.  The branches shook and parted with a squeal as the head poked into the clearing.  Bird eyes the size of cantaloupes looked at the two men with a quizzical stare, first from one side of the massive beak, and then the other.
Jeb poked Bud with his rifle.  Bud seemed frozen as the head started rising, breaking free of the low trees until it towered thirty feet over them. Meleagris Rex watched as the two former top predators started running.  "Gobble-gobble" it rumbled as it started after them.

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